Midnight's Thunder 2002-11-26 9:17 p.m.


As much as I understand the importance of you... I understand the ache of the pain you bring.

You are DaVinci in ways you never knew... you are brilliance like it has never shone before. You are beautiful... and as much of a child I was... I wasn't wrong to love you. It wasn't wrong to want to fight on your behalf.

And now I sit here... so long after and what value do I hold to you? What truth have I in your heart and head? But none, my friend.

I don't push to dominate you... I push this fucking hard so you can see me standing here... so you can hear me screaming... and you never do. Ever... until you're a third across the country and you decide it's far time you heard what I was yelling a year ago.

We both know some opportunities come too late... we both know that friendships die and hearts break.... I just don't know if I am strong enough anymore...

I don't think I can hold you... and I know you never asked me to... But i am so small... my shoulders are weak and my back is going to crumble in the torture you press against me.

It never ends for you and I... there just is no end to you doing... me thinking... my trying to hold to something... and you not giving a damn about anything - or so it seems from here.

I could count your every dream on the night sky and run out stars before I was through... Can you count my dreams?

You made me cry too hard tonight... the simple things you say and mean... the simple things you just don't do.

I don't know if the depth of my affection runs that deep in you.


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