� Misery � 2003-08-27 � 12:10 p.m. �

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I am miserable.

I am writing to you from two small slits in my face where eyes once were... hard swollen lumps of pain have replaced them. I have circles so far down my face that my cheeks look like pockets for catching rain. I have absolutely no definition between jaw and neck nor can I lay my arms to the side of my body, bend my knees or stick my thighs together.

I taste blood and salt... and when I sit up I cough... I cough until I aggrevate my usually very mild to not-even-there asthma.... and have to choke back ventolin.

Then I suffer from the extreme shakes... and migrains... my heart beats really fast... I don't tolerate ventolin well... I never have. And at the end of it all I puke. Salt and blood.

And I sleep so not to suffer and when I wake... it starts all over again.

For fuck's sake.

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