� awake � 2003-07-16 � 7:33 p.m. �
My cousin is young... but like many woman on my father's side, our grandmother and her mother included, she is plagued by fibroid tumours in her uterus, on her ovaries, and in her case, even down to the end of her cervix....
Yesterday, 33 and three babies later, she had a massive hysterectomy... they removed everything.
She has never taken anesthetic very well... She once had nasal surgery where she woke up briefly in the middle of it, but her anesthesiologist was quick to put her back out before she could remember any of it... she gave birth naturally all three times.... drug free...
Knowing of her past surgical history, yestersday's anesthesiologist suggested that an epidural would be less risky for her. She won't be asleep, so she can't wake up... and being in an out twice in such a short time is very hard on the heart... during invasive surgery, losing so much blood, he thought it would be better not to take the chance.
She went for it.
In the middle of her surgery... somewhere between cutting and ripping organ's out of her body the anesthic wore OFF... or perhaps never froze her completely internally... and as they tore something out of her, she, wide AWAKE... screamed in all fury... they asked her what hurt.... thinking perhaps it was her IV... or maybe her heart...
And they realized then she had FULL sensation back below her waist. She passed out... and they put her under.
It's something you only hear on Urban Myths Revealed... that isn't something you think would happen... and it's kind of scary.
She isn't doing well... she doesn't have a very supportive family... her mother could really care less, it seems. My parents have been by her side since yesterday.... Mum took the day today to sit with her... comfort her... help her eat, and walk. She's in so much pain...
I called her tonight to tell her I love her and that I am thinking of her... she wept a little... and spoke in so much pain it broke my heart. I hung up... and cried.
We haven't always seen eye-to-eye... I don't agree with everything she has done in life... but even despite that, she's fabulous to me...
Even though she was hurting.... we managed to laugh a little... lightly... and even though she was drugged to the hilt she recognized my voice right away... one of the very few in this world to call me Mandy.
She finds out at the end of the week if her tumours are cancer... for love, strength, and her kids, I hope to hell it's not.
My day was crazy before this... thoughts of this might keep me awake.
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