� Illusions of sleep � 2003-03-06 � 8:42 a.m. �

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For the second time this week I dreamt Mum phoned to tell me she's sick...

I could tell you exactly what with even, but I don't want to think of it...

I guess it's a fate coming slowly anyway... and maybe I fear that it's coming sooner than later....

I woke up tired.... tired of crying... of throwing myself down... exhausted from weighing staying here or going there, though I know the choice isn't a hard one to make.

I also dreamt of Virginia, a childhood friend who lost her father in grade 10.... she was standing behind me when I fell over in my dream...

I guess that's what we all need isn't it? Whether just an illusion of our sleep or the reality of our world... we all need someone strong who understands us to be there should we fall....

I need you to stand behind me.

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