� Regardless � 2002-09-02 � 5:00 p.m. �
This game of tag won't work for me...
As much as it hurts you... imagine what it does to me. I live with the scars everyday... I am whole different girl because of it.
I joust with distance knowing I can't let anyone close enough to see me... to see this and what it does to me always.
I was a kid... that's all i was... and I shouldn't have been there with him... alone. I paid the consequence with blood. And I am sorry.
I didn't come to you because I wanted to... I rather have not told you at all... but for my soul I had to. I can't live lying to you anymore.
I wasn't made to crack, you know... it doesn't come naturally and when my world recently came falling down around Blair and I... when I was lost in something i can't turn away from... telling you is all I could do.
How do I explain that you are safe for me. You are strength and comfort and esteem... you are everything he took from me. And without knowing you, i would have let him kill me. Gladly.
I am bitter, i am angry I am ugly... I am stained.
And I never wanted this. But it came to me now and it came with avengence...
All I wanted was for you to apologize and to love me... regardless.
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