� It's all a huge lie really. � 2002-07-17 � 8:11 p.m. �
No matter how far you run for however long.. there is certainly no place like home.
With that said... let me add that I hate camping... and I realized these past five days that the majority of those who say they genuinely LIKE camping must either be lying through the skin of their teeth... or suffer from a mild form of Alternate Personality Disorder.
These are the people who live in suburbia... go to school or work... sit inside all year around and then claim they "love nature and outdoorsiness..." for one week in July, at least.
They eat copias amounts of fast food... since they're too lazy to cook and for the same laziness let their dishes sit for decades in their sink.... even with a dishwasher cleaning up is a chore... BUT they will without hesitation cook over a camp stove that has been sitting in a year's grease and grime... and eat food barely fit for human consumption... for the sake that it is that one week in July where they stop being their human selves and start being little camper people.
I really think the whole thing is a crock... the whole camper etiquitte... the "must wave to all campers"... the very same people who will give you the finger if you look at them the wrong way any other week of the year.
It's craziness to me... and the whole conspiracy of lies that surround it. Anyone who tells you sleeping on ROCK hard ground in the middle of a rainstorm is fun... owns a huge fucking RV and has never had to do it. EVER!
Even as a kid, Mum tells me.. I hated the whole concept of camping... and despite what you might think, by the way I am now... I was then a little grubby tree climber and frog hunter... But with age I found hygiene and common sense and I learned the line between reality and make-beleif... I learned there is nothing relaxing about having to cook with very little and clean up with even less.. I learned that doing nothing is and will always be BORING.
Ask a camper why they genuinely like camping and you'll get these answers: "I like being outside" and "It's relaxing"... both of which usually contradict their everyday life. They go outside RARELY... exercise never and wouldn't ever tell you scrubbing a crusty pot with their finger nails is their idea of a little R&R.
Most of these people wouldn't go a day without showering... let alone a week... wouldn't wear a naked face out in public... wouldn't not gel or blow-dry their hair... BUT they'll tell you that that's all nothing in the name of Grace and CAMPING....
But I must give credit where credit is due... there are a few true wild-hearts out there...who really and truly don't mind wrestling a spider for the seat in the loo... who don't mind being rough and unshaven and smelly...
There are those who take huge amounts of time out of their everyday lives to do this... and those, my friends are campers... movers... travelers and doers... they are the ones that have a defense when cross examined... who know exactly what they like about it and why.
I dated a guy like that for years... and he'll tell you it's less fun... more CHEAP! Now there's a buyable answer... one I could almost accept...
I spent five days remembering why I am one of those campers who rather not camp at all. I hate it... in every sense of the word hate. Mostly I hate being dirty... and hate working when I want to relax, and I hate food that comes out of different cans, but yet still tastes like rancid grease sitting 52 weeks straight, or even better... Tastes like burning... the burning of trash coals and damp wood from below... YUM.
I like showering EVERY day without my shoes on... I like brushing my teeth in water that won't give me cankers or cold sores.... or the runs.
I love all the modern convienences we've been given through centuries upon centuries or hard work and knowledge... and you know... if I have to save a buck and camp... so beit. I will. If my boyfriend wants to camp for a weekend... a day or two... I'll camp with him if I have to. Don't, however expect that I'll enjoy it.
There is ABSOLUTELY nothing to fancy about mosquitos biting my bum when I am trying to pee... or a spider climbing my leg to get a better look at the goods.
Somethings I can live without...
I like the outdoors... and nature always... regardless of month or season... and i don't feel a need to prove it.
� previous � next � comments � diaryland � old �