� Brought to you by Paxil � 2002-02-04 � 9:22 p.m. �
A new job... a new day... and with a bit of practice it will be no problem...
I suffer from a anxiety disorder... like you know when you worry about walking to work in the rain in the middle of February... it doesn't rain a whole hell of lot in February here... when I worry about the cold and it's been above zero lately.
I worry about taking a job now when I actually have an opportunity to take a bit of time off and collect UI... yes those things keep me awake.
I worry about getting my boyfriend in trouble on those rainy/cold days when he goes in an hour later to take me to work... I don't drive... for financial reasons... and for personal reasons... I worry about having the time to take driving classes...
i worry about this body... and I worry about this mind.
Why as woman do we feel we need to give a good fight?
Why can't we be like most men, and not give a damn?
My ex was a brilliant man... he taught himself about self-preservation... self-respect... self-value. He knew what to worry about and what not to... he began his day in a meditative state and he closed it off the same...
A maybe that's a huge reason we would never last... I am not at all like that... I start my day off with caffeine - and if I could afford to smoke I'd guarantee nicotine....
The differences us between us... we went mad... It was probably all me.
So it's almost half nine.. and I should be asleep... but my body is too tired... sore... my mind drained...
I am due for a hit of liquid life... The pain is brutal when my blood begins to curdle. I am sure my counts are not sustained...
Needles.... Yay!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
My Gram died this day 1989...
She's very missed... I dare say most of all by me. Where would I be?
I love you... and I miss you... if any one woman could ever get me through, without hesitation, weakness or doubt, Grammy, it would be you.
� previous � next � comments � diaryland � old �