Adam never could do right by Eve 2005-12-22 9:17 p.m.


~ Today I was in the car fumbling for music. I was stuck Decarie at a red and I grabbed the first at the bottom on of the CD tray and threw it in on random.

"Afternoon, see a guy with rubies on his hand, and he's shifting like shifting like he was dead."

I found myself singing to it like I knew the words, and I found myself thinking about you so profoundly I lost my train of thought and nearly got into a wreck.

For however long this all took I was brought back to the last time you walked out on me, the last time in your effort to love me.

I could see you there, sitting beside me in the car. You hair curly and crazy and pinned up like a wind storm. Your eyes marvellous but sad.

It was as clear as day that one moment when you said to me "when the weight comes down it comes down on you and then it comes down on me and I can't take anymore." I could see your tears as clear as if you were here. I could feel your heart hurt. It was surreal.

You were always so passionate and I can't help but think if you're still that way even without me. Or if maybe that's just what I brought to you. You were like a beautiful bouquet of fire and fury.

Yes, your growing up is hurting me, I think. When a fucking Tragically Hip song pulls at my heart strings, I know I'm not smoking enough dope or not getting enough of you. One of the two.

Anyway, Do you remember how I called after you to wait? That I didn't understand what this was about, why this wasn't working, what the weight was and you said, "One day, baby, you will..."

That was today.

"In my dreams, a candy coated train comes to my door with a little girl, I can't have anymore. You know a letter washes up to the shore that I cannot read and I probably should ignore."

I swear to God for the time the song played you were sitting beside me holding my hand. I could smell you, and feel you and by the time the music ended I could see you walk out of my front door all over again. I had to wipe the tears from my face when the light turned, and hope that the people next to me didn't notice a grown man crying a puddle in his fancy car.

The prices I pay for my regret.

But I get it now, I do and I'm sorry I never did before.~

As I said... pieces of me when all else has gone....

~~In the night there's a girl who doesn't mind her ragged sleeves... Knowing someone is gonna grieve... And a man he tells her a story, she just don't believe....

Calling Adam never could do right by Eve. ~



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