this is how a heart breaks 2005-08-26 7:23 a.m.


I don't feel better... but it's friday... so I should be able to force myself to make it to work... If I can't handle it, I'm sure my boss will make me go home... he'll probably take me home himself... It's happened before.

I guess we shall see. I should probably stay in bed. I can't talk... and I wish I could record my raspiness for you all... listening to my best whiskey-whore impression makes me laugh... I'm sure you'd find it funny too.

...this is how a heart breaks...

I couldn't explain one saddness if I tried... I won't even bother... I just don't understand it myself... I suppose I explained it well with "there are so few people that we connect with that fit with our lives and I feel when you find them, you have to fight for them... and if they have loves... then you compromise whatever you can for the sake of a good healthy friendship." But I give up... and this one can go it they choose.

For if you love... set it free... whatever the fuck that's suppose to mean.

The other crack in my heart is a wedding disappointment... and I lied like a good girl and said I understood... but I don't and it hurts... I'll get over it... but I guess I overestimated my place in the lives of others...

Though to balance it out... my Uncle David will be there... the way he makes me feel like I'm less a niece and more his daughter... he surprises me all the time.

Life is about...

Heartbreak and balance and being ok in between.


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