� Think � 2003-08-10 � 8:29 p.m. �
I am not going to tell you one way or the other how to walk this road. I know how you feel about your body... about medicine... but you're body has betrayed you... so consider betraying it back...
Be rational. Weigh the benefits over the consquence... think of your family... of Rhia and Luke... of Ewan, Liberty... of Stacey and her baby.... your baby.
There's a lot more to weigh than just "Chemo is bad". There's a LOT more at stake than just your life. Your life ends and world of lives around you fall too...
I hardly think of you becoming a father... and I guess selfishly... without me... I thought it unfeasible... that perhaps you just wouldn't... and without dragging the past all over the ground, I guess I never figured you'd get over it well enough to consider it. And I suppose consideration wasn't even a apart of it this time...
But thinking that you may have a child... and you know, whether it is yours of just her mistake.... it breaks me more to think of you withering... tired... knowing that a boy may someday need you to teach him how to board... or surf... and it is, of late, like you have given up.
It's hardly the man I know... the man who found the enegery and the funds to travel around the world in a vain pursuit at redemption...
Anything other that larrikin you just isn't.
I could be wrong, I haven't known you in three years. And people change, but I'd be shamed to know that your will fell away.
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