� Done with it. � 2006-05-12 � 10:51 p.m. �
Mama phones me today...
"Have I told you lately how much I love you?"
No, Mama... we haven't spoke in ages...
"Well, I love you..."
Well, I guess that's what Mama's are for...
We did our mother's day/father's birthday thing today and I thankfully feel about 10 fold better than last night...
It was the first "family" affair at our house... which was sort of lacking in family... since my brother-in-law split up with his girlfriend of almost 3 years and the kids she came with... and my sister-in-law is somewhere in BC playing nice with a boy... and I smile... for what it is to be 20 and carefree again... or 26 and single (I will never know) I'm forever glad my days of jumping from boy to boy are D-O-N-E.
There is something more than fabulous about having the same man at all times... for everything... even when you're as I've been... puking and feverish over a toilet for days... and he still wants "do it.." (the most 'get-me-in-the-mood' way to put it *haha*) call it love or the nature of man... it's just better than having to walk like a peacock looking for your next lay. Not that that has ever been the way I've lived anyhow... but I have seen it, and see it still amongst my friends... the constant need... the aching need to have someone - anyone for that matter - next to them.
I say Bah... and take no insult if you're one of the those I bah to... but BAH! I think when you're 20, you're still too dumb to know better... but by the time you're 25 you should love yourself enough to know you will survive alone... you should KNOW who you are without a man (or woman) in bed beside you... and for the love of god, if you don't... why would you fuck someone else's head up while you're trying to unfuck your own?
I have never fit in with my friends this way... I have never understood them... I never will... I'll never have to...
But I grin... Oh the things I know... the things I have always known... the things I may have learned on the way. If I could teach those who need to be taught... I would, I just don't think it works that way.
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